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Another holiday season is upon us. Churches are deco­rating, people are fasting, and stores are stocking up on candy to end a forty-day fast as soon as the over-­commercialized Easter Sunday comes along. Kids are look­ing for the Easter Bunny and the plastic multicolored eggs that he will hide filled with candy. Perhaps candy that the children gave up for the last forty days. What a way to live a season. Give something up only in anticipation to receive it tenfold in the end. It seems almost, spiritual.

Well, this is not the season of spirits, but rather this is another season of hatred. We all know how much rabbits hate chickens and how the mischievous Easter Bunny gets into our houses and hides eggs not to be found until their rotting insides burst, filling the house with a stench of, well, rotten eggs.

We should strive for peace and the only way to strive for peace is for the truth be told about the animosity be­tween the two animals that are displayed on every store window whether it be grocery, hardware, or dime store. It is only through knowing the history that we can resolve the conflict between these two creatures in what is supposed to be a sad time during the passion of Christ only to turn happy when he came back to life. Maybe in the same way, the hatred between rabbits and chickens can be killed, and then allow harmony to rise up between the two species.

Back in the Middle Ages, a group of people started an ad campaign for eggs. Eggs were thought to be the new wave and soon every farmer was growing eggs in his back yard. More eggs mean fewer carrots and other greens for the rabbits to eat in the farmers gardens, which lead to a starva­tion of rabbits. Certain rabbits found this unbearable and decided to start a campaign that would allow their kind to become house pets. While these rabbits were content being spoiled and pampered, other “wild” rabbits found it hu­miliating.

These “wild” rabbits found a way to vent their emo­tions by vandalizing Farmer Brown’s eggs. First they thought of inventing the ritual of “egging houses.” But this led to finding out that eggs made great paint when mixed with other elements. Next the rabbits painted the eggs with various colors and gang symbols, only to find out that kids liked the “pretty eggs.” Soon the rabbits would sneak into the houses, steal the eggs from the kids, and hide them. This plan backfired as the kids loved hunting for the stupid things.

Chickens were getting all the credit and the rabbits, who refused to become prissy, pampered pets, lost all hope until one day something fateful happened. An English rabbit by the name of Dudly was hiding eggs one March Sunday morning in 1594 when two kids in London saw him. Trying to hide the evidence, he sat there on top of the egg, hoping the kids would not notice the colored egg below him. Things were going fine until one of the kids decided to stop petting the creature and pick him up, revealing the egg.

Rumors soon spread that a rabbit on Easter was going around laying eggs in places and kids soon went looking for them. The chickens did not like this one bit, so in 1595, they stopped laying eggs, causing the great egg scare. No problem. Colored, wooden eggs were used instead. When plastic was developed in 1856, the colored plastic egg was used. Thus the hatred of chickens by rabbits was reversed and now rabbits became the enemy of chickens.

Some say that there are underground chicken groups that push for the domestication of rabbits. If one thinks care­fully, the Easter Bunny is everything that the wild, rebel rab­bit forces pushed against. First of all, the name Bunny is some childish, prissy name that Dudly and his fellow rab­bits pushed against. Second, the Easter Bunny seems domes­ticated. It allows children to sit on its lap while its picture is taken in the malls across America.

It is also rumored that this selective chicken group owns a share of Warner Bros., the studio that created “Bugs Bunny,” a lovable rabbit who pokes fun at hunters. Another rabbit character is Harvey, who co-starred with the late James Stewart (1908-1997) in the movie Harvey. This movie showed that a belief in these tall furry creatures was foolish. Another link can supposedly be made between the group and lucky rabbit foot exports from China.

And now you know the rest of the story.

About Chad Leigh Kluck

Chad Leigh Kluck
I am the author of the book I Think Therefore I Am, A Collection of My Thoughts (2000). I don't write humor and fiction as much as I used to, but I still remain active online writing about technology, DIY projects, railroads, and history. More...

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